Sounds like this would need some customization. One option could be to throw all possible options onto the page, and then control them through jquery or some server side code snippets. Otherwise, seems like a custom webpart would be needed. I would recommend a custom webpart over the other options as well, because is js is disabled on a persons browser, then that method won't work. Maybe start with cloning the shoppingcartitemselector control and setting some conditions for loading your product options.